Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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