i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
