Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
