AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Who died my cat blue again?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
