Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
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