I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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