He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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