i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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