try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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