So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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