You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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