thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
