love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
