yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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