You're completely useless in the revolution.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
