Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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