I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
God, I missed his penis.
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