Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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