i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
