I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
