I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
