some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
