Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
