We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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