he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize