It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
