i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Randomize
