Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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