Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
