The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
