I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
