She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
She even gives head with a lisp.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
