I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
