its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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