Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
