You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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