Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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