break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
