This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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