Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
this will be a night to untag.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
