These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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