Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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