i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
