My boss' voice literally gives me gas
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
