i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Its about making memories worth repressing
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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