Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
