i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
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