Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
it was like eating out sand paper
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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