yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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