seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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