yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
